Being gifted is not a label...it's a lifestyle.
Co existing with gifted children completely alters your life because, at least in my case, they are incredibly intense, sensitive and emotional. Everything they experience is amplified and therefor one must navigate carefully so as not to create more stress and anxiety than necessary. My children are not sheltered from real life but, instead, they are experiencing it in a different way than most. I am constantly gleaning more insight as to who my kids are and what drives them.
It is a daily learning lesson.
Some days are delightful...mostly when we stick to our regularly scheduled program. At home everyone is happily playing and learning independently or collaboratively.
When we venture out one never knows what to expect. They might be enjoyable or they might seem like wild animals that need to go back in their cage.
Life is unpredictable with precocious kids replete with many highs and lows and a lot of confusion...on my part, not theirs. I am understanding more and more how to head off disequilibrium before I have too many overexcitabilities to deal with at once. The hardest part is when we schedule outtings with our "normal" friends and I feel like I have to constantly explain the idiosyncracies. It is easier being around our like minded friends because they get it...all of it, and I don't need to constantly apologize for my unique and sometimes challenging children.

I have been there and done this. It will get easier and there were times that I yearned for a normal life with a shocking intensity. Then someone told me that the apple doesn't fall very far from the tree. Which to me meant that my children's parents were also gifted and quirky and it is ok. We survived and grew to adulthood and our kids would too! We were breaking the mold of normal all the time. Home schooling was our best option. Stay in your schedule and keep them learning. It was at times a lot like being a cruise ship director for extremely demanding tourists and yes we did discipline them if them need it.
ReplyDeleteOh, how I can relate to this. You are right that is more than a label. Our homeschooling, our choices of who to play with and where to go are so often decided by giftedness. It seems that no one around me understands how difficult it is and I too find myself having to explain behaviors more than I'd like.
ReplyDeleteYup, I can so relate. We've homeschooled all along (my kids are 3 and 7) and many days I long to pass them off to a gifted school... but I don't, and we keep going, and every single day I struggle with the challenge of creating equilibrium. But also I see them bloom, and get to see their unique wonderful selves. Lately I've also been really aware of how we are letting them experience life in a different way than most, and what a gift that is. Thanks for the post!
ReplyDeleteI have an almost 8yr old and 9 yr old and both are gifted. I also understand and feel as you do. And it is strange how many just don't realize that it is so much more challenging on any given day. When too many of those overexcitabilities get factored in it that it really makes for a rough week. More so on us parents and us trying to keep our calm to calm them. At least I am lucky. Not only am I gifted too but my husband is as well so we have a strong bond between all 4 of us. Makes it a whole lot easier then some other people I've met raising gifted kids. I had a miserable childhood because I was trapped in the public school, granted it wasn't why I pulled them out to homeschool them I wish it was. Because that means I would have done it sooner. It has made such an improvement on our happiness.
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