Talk and Fidget Much?

I am staring at the blank screen trying to figure out what to blog about and L is next to me coding...and talking. He really does not ever stop talking. All talk, all tech, all day. "You know what makes me feel the most proud about myself? I am creating my own game apps completely from scratch. I am not using any libraries or physics engines...I am programming my own gravity. There are many different ways of doing it. There are some tricks that save you a lot of time and I have discovered how to do it." And then the tech speech launches about just how to do it. This is my day, every day. The incessant talking, sharing, theories, and observations came at such a young age and just have never stopped. The content changes but the quantity of talk has definitely not dissipated. He has so much on his mind and although much of it is quite interesting I do have to feign interest at times. Early on he was a self proclaimed TALKER. It used to be that he would talk even while eating or brushing his teeth or sleeping...just no stopping it unless he was around new people or uncomfortable surroundings. His brain doesn't stop and verbalizing out loud seems to help him solve some of the ideas he is trying to work out. It is exhausting for me and I, too, am a verbose person. We, as a family, are just intense to be around. Even my girlfriends who share a love of quick banter will stop and remind me that I really love to talk. I guess the apple fell where I left it.

Both L and S love to share stories and theories while pacing back and forth...their bodies are trying to keep up with their minds. I get it, a little, because when I am on a business call I prefer to pace and talk as well...it does keep the ideas flowing quickly for me. With L and S it seems like the thoughts are flooding their minds and they have to get out the ideas with their whole bodies. It can be odd to watch but it is almost as if you can see the ideas churning as they are pacing and moving about the room.  All this incessant talking and moving would clearly make many believe my kids have ADHD.   Then there is the fidgeting. L constantly has something in his hand that he is manipulating...while talking and moving. It is a lot to take in. One of the fidget toys makes a clicking sound as L frenetically twists and turns it into cool shapes. It is like a cacophony of sounds and movement which rivals sensory overload for the audience. L is definitely high in pscyhomotor overexcitabilties and gifted kids like him are easily misdiagnosed. He also learns kinesthetically among the myriad of learning styles he espouses. Learning at home does give him much greater freedom to move about like the little hummingbird that he is.  In most schools they would want to medicate him and yet his wild energy does not interfere with his learning. In fact, I think his high energy is what also gives him his relentless drive to learn and create. So if learning is happening then is a disorder the right call? He can focus for long periods of time in many areas and he accomplishes many goals that he sets out for himself. From all that I have read on the topic the answer suggests that it relates more to his OEs and giftedness than to rise to the level of a pathology.  I certainly would not want to medicate that which is part of his normal development to becoming the person he is supposed to be. There was a time when I used to pathologize each little quirk or unsettling behavioral phase until I realized they were just quirks and phases. As parents we worry and react and even overreact at times. Our society seems to be very quick to accept a disorder label but yet it appears harder to accept the G label as a means for explaining the underlying aspects of the behavior. Many highly gifted kids have a lot of quirks that resemble pathological symptoms. And, many gifted kids are twice-exceptional. We need to embrace and nourish the quirks and be open to alternative views to pathologizing and medicating our children as a first resort. We are still navigating this bumpy road of asynchrony, overexcitabilities and eccentricities. It is never dull and it is definitely not "typical."

"Being unique has its challenges." L, age 9.